News, news, news

We are celebrating that we are FINALLY hearing news today.   We don't have any news specific to our case, but we have news.   That may not sound like much, but to us this is HUGE.   I won't bog you down with over technical adoption language and details, but in very simple terms the stage we are at is called the referral stage. We, along with MANY other families, have been stuck in this stage and there has been NO movement for anybody in this stage since late 2013.  Basically all of these families are waiting for the IBESR (Haitian governing division over adoptions) to issue the referral of a child to them, which makes the child match official and also triggers the required 2 week bonding trip.  From that point, the usual average is about 6 months and the child comes home.  Ok, so whenever I tell people this they think 6 months is such a long time. And I do absolutely agree, but in a process that has already been a year and half with very little movement, 6 months seems like nothing and we will take it!  

I don't really know how many families like us are stuck in this stage; my semi educated guess would say probably 150 to 200 families are in this stage of waiting. We have been waiting since February of this year with basically no updates and no movement.  And while today's news is not specific to us and we aren't aware of any movement with our referral, we are celebrating as many creche blogs and our agency are reporting that IBESR has issued the first 3 family referral matches and IBESR is indicating there are many more to come soon and that they are hiring an additional 5 staff members and a new judge to assist with all this upcoming movement. This is so encouraging and I truly feel in my heart we will have our referral very soon.  I also feel overjoyed for the children and families of the first 3 matches.  

I can feel God working right now and can see the work He has been been doing in us recently to prepare us to enter into this next exciting stage.   When we decided to adopt we did not step into this without much prayer, education, and preparation.  It is a very popular misconception that families who are adopting are going to bring a child home who is grateful to join there new family and all the luxuries that American's have.  This is NOT the case.  When you think about an orphan, the fact that they are in that position means they have lost their biological parents by one circumstance or another, not only that, they have been through many tragic situations and have been living in a state of limbo without knowing where they belong or having any confidence that they belong to anyone or what their future holds.  Ed and I were just talking last night about how in our childhood we never once doubted we had a family, never once doubted that the place we called home would not be there, never once doubted that someone was caring for us, never once doubted we would have food, water and shelter, and we always took these basic needs for granted and were blessed with abundantly more.  An orphan child has spent much of their life with all of those doubts and have most likely at multiple times seen each one of those things played out, can you imagine???? It breaks my heart, actually destroys my heart to think of any child experiencing that.    So we know when our child does come home, that our job is to enter into that dark place of mourning with her, and to show her the most intentional love and have great compassion with her as she processes through all of her fears, anxieties, loss and all the many scars she has buried in her soul. The past few weeks I have been feeling more and more compelled to again dive back into learning more about this emotional process and arming myself with many tools on how to best walk through these deep wounds with our child.  We have been praying over our child's wounds and her heart.  The Amazon boxes with new books on this subject have been showing up regularly.  Now, that I have gotten this news, I can see God's work in reigniting this desire to be educated the past month as I know HE knows everything and the exact timing of our journey and is preparing us for what is next to come, and I believe He has confirmed to me that it is coming soon.

So, what is next?  Well, we wait, we wait for the next email or phone call from our agency saying it is time and that our referral has been made and we need to go to Haiti for our 2 week bonding trip.  We are so thankful for so many of you who have been faithful in praying with us over our adoption and family. I cannot tell you how encouraging the comments, notes, emails, and facebook post are when you let us know you are praying.   So for specific prayer request, we are praying first for the heart of both of our girls to be prepared for what is to come in our family, we are praying every night for the safety and care of our adopted daughter and for peace and confidence in her heart that she belongs to our family and she will come home. We are praying for our wisdom in how to parent our children and the challenging situations we know will come.  We are also praying mightily that our referral will come very soon....very, very soon!

We do have a few other ways you can step in and help this adoption if you would like to.  As we stated above, our next step will be our two week trip, which requires airfare and in country lodging at $110 a night. And then, Lord willing, 6 months after that will be round trip purchases of 2 more air tickets....but more importantly the purchase of a ONE way ticket from Haiti to USA......I get butterflies even thinking of that ticket!  We do all our flying through American Airlines, so if you by chance happen to have some extra AAdvantage miles you aren't planning to use or would like to donate we would love to have them (unfortunately, American does have a transfer fee they charge to do this).   But if you want to do this we would be SO appreciative and you can do so at    AAdvantage Point Sharing and our AAdvantage number is 5ELV526 .

Another option where you can help us with travel expenses, if you feel led, is you can donate (tax deductible) through our fundraising website at Lifesong Adoption Donations , just complete the online form and fill in "#4035" in  Family Account Number field and "Daniel Family" in family name fields.

Again, we are praying for BIG movement soon and feel like it is coming.    I hope we will be posting many more updates very soon.   It is funny, when I posted a quick announcement this morning another adoptive mom from Chances for Children posted a comment to me that was exactly my sentiments.  She said she hasn't been keeping up her blog lately as things have been so discouraging.   I have thought this so many times, so I am SO excited to be posting again and to feel as though this season of waiting and discouragement is near its end!