The countdown has begun....

We are so excited that we finally are at a stage where we can answer the age old question from everyone who has followed our family through this journey of "When will she be home".   At this point we believe Mirlande's passport has been issued, which means any day now we will enter basically the VERY LAST PHASE of the process which is called USCIS (essentially immigration).  This phase is on the U.S. side of things and is fairly consistent in time frames.   Delays can still come up in this phase, so we appreciate prayers that this will go smoothly, but more times than not things do go smoothly.    So that means in 4-6 weeks Mirlande will be HOME!  We are praying it is 4 weeks.

The Daniel Family

With that in mind there is a lot of last minute scurrying going on to prepare for her.  I am so grateful for my employer, who has been so supportive during our adoption process, and with them I will be able to take the whole summer off once Mirlande gets home.  Claire is really looking forward to this as well.   When we do bring her home we will be in a stage called "cocooning", which essentially is being very intentional in providing Mirlande a very small environment where we aren't venturing out much or interacting with many outside of our family, but instead will be at home really focused in on connecting as a family and walking alongside Mirlande as she adjust to her family.    I also will be working with Mirlande on helping her prepare to start school next year in 5th grade.

We also will have a very structured summer, as kids that come from hard backgrounds really need structure in order to feel safe.  This isn't exactly in line with my personality, so this will be stretching me, but I am working on a schedule that involves lots of structured playtime, reading/writing/math practice, very healthy and interactive meal plans, and mostly lots of fun.  Claire is looking forward to Field Trip Fridays, where we have decided (if all goes as plans) that Fridays will be our fun day to venture out.

In my last blog I mentioned Mirlande's big plans for her going away party outfit at the creche, here is the fancy dress she picked out:

Mirlande's fancy outfit for her going away party 

We also are getting together party supplies for the going away party that we will through for her at the creche to say goodbye to all her friends and all the staff at C4C.    We do have one special element you can be part of.    We have decided that Mirlande's "story" of how she came to our family and how she came to C4C is in fact just that, her story, and it is not ours to tell.  That being said, without providing any details, we are aware of two people who are very significant to her past that we hope to meet, or at minimum pass on some letters and  gifts to them.    As our gift we had quilts made for them and we have attached ribbons to the quilt, which each ribbon represents a prayer that we have prayed for Mirlande, her adoption, or these two people.  That being said, if you have supported us through prayer in this adoption and would like to be part of this prayer gift, we would love if you sent us 2 pieces of ribbon (no more than 12 inches each) and we will attach them to the quilts.   If you won't see me in the next few weeks and don't have our mailing address shoot me an email at klisst@prodigy.net or message me on facebook and I will give you our address to send the ribbon to.   We hope this will be a very special gift for two very special people to us and to Mirlande.

Quilt 1- You can see some of the ribbons tied on already.  I love the scripture in this verse "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding, seek His will in all you do, and He will direct your path- Proverbs 3:5-6" 

Quilt 2- A very talented woman at our church made this one and we just love is filled with words of praises.  

We can't wait to see this face in just a few weeks- LOVE.THAT.SMILE!

We are in the home stretch now

After three years it is looking like we are in the final stretch and we could not be more excited to bring Mirlande home.   I shared on facebook a few weeks ago that we got her adoption decree which changed her name to Mirlande Daniel and allowed us to finally share a bit more about our sweet daughter.   

So here is where we are at now, currently we are in a stage called MOI, basically a rubber stamp stage checking to make sure everything was done correctly.  We expect to be out of this stage very soon.  Next, her passport will be issued, that should take 1-3 weeks.  Then her file will go through USCIS (essentially immigration).  This phase typically takes 8-10 weeks, however, recently there have been families moving through as quickly as 4 weeks. From there her VISA to travel home should be issued very shortly after USCIS is finalized and then guess what, she is HOME!   So we could be looking at homecoming as early as May, or very realistically in  early June.   Praise Jesus for bringing us to this point and making our beautiful family in this way.   

One of the awesome things about Mirlande being older, she is 11 now, is that she can tell us what she wants and does not want.   It is typical that all families through a party at the creche when it is time to go home.  Mirlande has big plans for this....specifically for her wardrobe.  She is quite the fashionista and typically goes through 3-4 outfits a day.  You know, a girl has got to have the right outfit for every activity in a day.   Anyways, for a year now she has been telling us she wants a very fancy white dress, we were given specifics on length, material, fit, style.  I just LOVE this. So just this last week we sent her pictures of a few dresses to choose from and she had a clear front runner, which we ordered for her.  It was SO exciting to be finally ordering this dress, the homecoming dress.  We still need to pickup some heeled dress shoes and a veil....yes, she said she wants a veil, or at least some sort of headpiece.   What a crack up this kid is.  

She also has told us that when she flies home at the airport she wants a BIG welcoming with lots of people, including all the people who traveled to Haiti with our church.   

Claire is getting very excited to FINALLY have a sister here at home.   She says playing on the trampoline by herself is so boring.   Claire and Mirlande get along beautifully.   Claire has been to Haiti twice to hang out with Mirlande, and it is astonishing how well they connect and play with each other.  Both of them just laugh and giggle ALL.THE.TIME together.   

Mirlande is also very funny. She is the one in a group who will be playing jokes and keeping people talking and trying to make everyone laugh....that is after she gets over her initial shyness, which comes out here and there.   I can't wait to see how having a jokester in the family is going to add to all the FUN we have together.

Hoping soon to share with you that we have exited MOI and are ready for passport printing! 

December Visit to Haiti

Philipians 4:6-7 Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ. Jesus. 

So many times we are asked "How do you make it through the wait?" as we are nearing our 3 year mark into our adoption journey of our daughter. I will say that the only way I can explain not going insane throughout this process is a peace that comes from Christ. It is CRAZY how long this adoption is taking, and it feels like every time we turn a corner and move to a point where things are supposed to go smoothly and quickly, something goes sideways that wasn't expected. But, I will say, I have found a peace in the wait and am trusting that the Lord will use this wait for good. It is a peace I don't understand, as I desperately want our daughter home, but again, I have peace through the wait.

Last week was a FABULOUS week.  Ed, Claire and I traveled to Haiti for a week and spent wonderful time with our daughter (sorry, still can't publicly say her name or share a picture, but we are getting closer).  On our trip we shared time with two other adoptive families from our creche.  One of my greatest takeaways from this trip is getting to know our daughters personality better as I watched her interact with her friends and also as she opened up to us more. 

Enjoying stunning views from the Baptist Mission in Kenscoff, Haiti

First she is stunningly beautiful inside and out.   Her personality is bigger than life and she is a natural born leader. She has no problem speaking her mind, but it is always in love.  She is very playful and the one who is cracking the jokes and making everyone around her smile. She can be shy in a new setting, but only for a short time.  Once she warms up, she can be very silly, and if she thinks no one is looking you will hear her singing to herself and dancing.   She is very observant and has such a caring heart.  If she sees anyone getting upset about something she will immediately sacrifice something she has to make them feel better.   Despite this long wait, she is so joyful and very clearly ready to come home to us.  

I have been very blessed to travel to Haiti multiple times throughout this process, however, Ed hasn't been able to come as much and this was his 3rd trip over a 3 year period.   Because of that, our daughters bond with me has become very strong, but Ed's bond with her was not as cemented.   My heart overflowed this trip watching that bond grow.  There was one moment on our last night where we went out to dinner and during dinner. completely on her own she went over to daddy to sit on his lap.   Ed's face was beaming and my heart was full.   I feel like both Ed and I are now equally connected to our daughter.

Also beautiful to see is how easy and natural the connection comes with our new daughter and Claire.   They have so much fun together and all you can hear when they are together is giggles.   At one point on the trip the two girls were playing and out of nowhere Claire said "I have the best big sister ever".   Be still my heart.   Our older daughter is so sweet in her interactions with Claire and they have so much fun together.

The cherry on our trip was on our last day we got fantastic news that we finally got the piece of paper we have been waiting on for 5 months that is needed to proceed to the next step.   This "should" have taken a few weeks for us to progress to the next step, but again, things went sideways and it instead took 5 months.  We are over joyed to once again be able to say that it appears things are moving forward in our adoption again.  We are now at the point where things should go smoothly and quickly, but we need every prayer for it to actually go smoothly.

In very vague terms we basically have 4 steps left to homecoming with each step has lots of mini-steps within it.  Our next step is for our file to go to court and for the adoption decree being issued......which would officially complete the adoption in Haiti and our daughter will have our last name at that point and we can then share pictures and her name.   The next step is to get approval of the US, then from the next step is to issue her passport, and then the final step will be her VISA which gives us the all clear to bring her home!   The most optimistic opinion says she can be home by this Spring.  A more realistic homecoming is probably more like summer 2016.....but we are praying for early Spring. 

Trusting in the Lord

It has been about a month since we received our exit letter which transitions us out of the Haitian side of things and after a few small steps, into the American side of the adoption.    This exit letter was imperative on moving closer to bringing our sweet daughter home and finally being able to share her name and picture with all of you that have walked with us through this journey. We still aren't at that point yet, but we are getting closer.  Keep those prayers coming.

We get bi-monthly updates on our sweet girl and she is stunning and is growing into a beautiful young lady.  It breaks my heart to see her growing up apart from us and we are relentlessly praying that she will be home with us by this Christmas.  In February she will turn 11!  We started this process right after she turned 8.  I still struggle with wrapping my mind around how this can possibly be.  We are trusting and believing that the Lord will bring our daughter home by Christmas, even when it appears impossible.   

Claire has been growing more and more excited to bring her sister home as well.  The other night I was tucking her into bed, and our big dog Jack-Jack was in her bed too and it was quite crowded with all three of us in bed and she told me we are going to have to teach Jack-Jack to get out of this bed so there is room for sister soon.  Apparently Claire is planning that they will be sleeping in the same bed together when she gets home.  In everything we do Claire is commenting on how her sister will be included when she comes home. She is very excited to have a sister.

As I believe we are nearing homecoming I have also been praying much more intentionally about preparing our daughters heart for our family and the HUGE transition she is going to have to make. She consistently tells us she is very excited and wants to come home and Chances for Children does an amazing job preparing the kids for the transition, however, it is still a transition that I don't think any of us could fathom making.   New culture, new surroundings, new friends, new family, new school, new rules, new environment, new everything.....when I start to list it all out I feel overwhelmed for her.  We are praying that the Lord will cover her and protect her through this transition period.

I also have been thinking a lot of her birth family and what they mean to me and how we are truly connected.   Ed and I firmly believe that our daughter's story is exactly that, her story, and when she comes home she will not bring one physical thing with her, the only thing she will have that is hers is her story, so we will not take that away from her and don't feel it is right to tell her story, so you won't hear anything from us on that.  However, we are aware that when we bring our daughter home we MAY be able to meet some of her birth relatives.   In Haiti so many families are forced to make hard decisions out of love for their children and such a huge portion of the population regularly face loss that we can't imagine.   With that being said, we have felt very called to cover our daughter's relatives in prayer, as we know ALL of our hope can only be in the Lord.    This is one area, if you felt led, we would love to have join us in prayer and have a very tangible way for our daughters relatives to know that they are covered in prayer by you.   

I had the following quilt made which will be a gift to our daughters relatives (which we may or may not get to meet, but are sure we can get it to them).   I pray that this would provide them encouragement and let them know they have angels in America covering them in prayer.  On it is has a block that says "For He will order His angels to protect you wherever you go" and also has scripture from Psalm on it.   But my favorite part is the angel wings.  On each wing there are ties, and it is my hope to tie a ribbon for each of the prayers prayed over both our daughter and her birth relatives to those ties......So we ask you to join us in prayer, and if you feel led, you can send us a ribbon representing your prayer, which we will tie to the blanket on the angel wing.  If you are part of a community/prayer group, and would like to share in this opportunity with your group, I would love for your group to take the blanket and prayer over as a group and add your ties.  Send me an email at klisst@prodigy.net if you need our info to either send us your prayer ribbons or if you would like to have the prayer blanket for you to pray over and add your tie.  I would love to see many prayer ties on behalf of our daughter and her birth relatives!

Prayer Quilt which will be given to our daughters birth family after the adoption is completed

From no news to tons of news

Oh how things can move SO slow in adoption and then in an instant so much can happen.   So in early August I traveled with a team of 13 others from my church to Chances for Children and got to visit my sweet little girl and spend  5 wonderful days with her.  We had a great trip.   She is so open and loving and such a fun little girl. She laughs so much and loves to play games. She especially loved that we had quite a few teenagers on our team and she thought they were the coolest!   She also amazes me with her compassion, kindness and respect.   She has one little baby at the creche who she especially loves.  She pulls her out of the crib all the time and just loves taking care of her, carrying her around and making her giggle and laugh.  I just love seeing this nurturing side in my daughter.  She truly is an AMAZING girl!  I can't wait till all of you can meet her and the day I can finally share her name and picture publicly.  So onto the big news.......

We are getting much closer.   We started the process of adopting our daughter in May of 2013, so currently we are well over 2 years into this process.   Since February of 2014 we have been stuck in IBESR, which is the government agency over adoptions in Haiti.   This is the step where everyone gets stuck, and while we were stuck for 18 months in that phase, I know of families who have and are stuck for even longer.  When you are stuck there is no estimate to know when you will get unstuck, you just have to wait and wait and wait, with no news, it is excruciating.   But as of last week we received the best news ever that we are finally unstuck and have EXITED IBESR!    This is HUGE!  It means we can actually answer the question everyone asks all the time of when is she going to come home.   There still are a few more hurdles, but none of them should cause major delays.   We have a few legalistic steps that still have to occur in Haiti, but in about 2-3 months we expect our adoption decree to be issued which means she will be given our last name and we will finally be able to share pictures and her name.   Shortly after that we will enter the US side of things.   This step had been backlogged recently, but I am feeling very encouraged after a recent call with our agency where they said they are seeing this step clearing up and moving faster for families right now.   Once we exit the U.S. side of things we just have to wait for a Visa and passport to be issued and then that will finally be the day we can bring her home.   We are praying for her to be home by Christmas.  We are told that might not be a realistic expectation, but I really believe it can happen.    What a great Christmas that would be!

Thank you to everyone who has supported us and given us encouragement along this way.  We truly have felt your prayers. It feels SO good to finally be moving forward and I am looking forward to much more news from this point forward!

Still can't show you her face, but here is a picture from my trip in August. 

Still Waiting......

I know many of your are curious as to where we are at and the number one question(s) we get is "What and why is this taking so long".  I wish I had an answer, truly , no one can really explain what the delay is, all that we know is that our file is still tied up in IBESR (Haitian governing authority over adoptions).   But I thought I would do a quick update to tell you where we are at and where we hope to be going soon.

So in March we had our two week required socialization visit with our daughter where we were interviewed by a social worker who determined we were a great match and she recommended to IBESR that our adoption be approved.   So after that we needed a few signatures and that would trigger and "exit letter" which literally would exit our adoption out of the Haitian system and she would at that time be legally ours in Haiti (but not in America yet).  So let me give you some insight into our frustration and the time delays that almost all families face when adopting in Haiti.   By the guidelines produced by the Haitian government the time from the end of the bonding trip to the time of the issuance of the exit letter "should" take 2 weeks......we have been waiting 3 1/2 months thus far and are still waiting.  And we know that the families that have gone before us have been waiting 5-6 months on average.  But we are hopeful!  We have reason to believe it is coming any day now.  And honestly, the days get harder and our patience is further tested when we "think" it is coming and then each day passes and we don't get it.   Our whole family is on pins and needles for this news. Every morning as soon as I wake up I check my email as our agency and Haiti is 3 hours ahead hoping to see "that" email in my inbox.  Every day when I pick up Claire from school the first thing she asks is if we got our exit letter.   It is really hard.  But we are taking a huge faith walk right now and trusting that Gods timing is best and He has a reason that we may never know for allowing the delays and our job is to continue to walk in obedience with joy through the wait.

We also have a lot of faith that God can move mountains and that even though we are given time frames we don't like for our family, those are not HIS time frames and He can provide us a miracle by moving past "mans" given time frames- Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in a persons heart, but it is the Lords purpose that prevails".    That being said, I do have a lot of days where I know Proverbs 19:21 in my heart, but I find myself relating more towards Proverbs 33:10 "The Lord nullifies the counsel of the nations; He frustrates the plans of the peoples".  That is how I feel during so much of the time, frustrated!

So next question you are wondering- "what happens after the exit letter, do you get to bring her home?".  I wish, but nope, that is not the case.  So after the exit letter we then have to begin the adoption on the American side of things and go through the immigration process.   This part use to be pretty consistent in averaging 5-6 months.  However, once again for no real reason, this process has recently been averaging families 9-12 months, at least that is what we are being told. But after all the immigration/US adoption stuff she finally can come home!

 Ed always says I am hopelessly optimistic....and in this case I am going to stick with that train of thought.  We were told this last time frame a few days ago and I have decided to refuse to believe it. I wouldn't even let it sit or soak in. My God is bigger than that!   So please join me in praying for our daughters home coming  by Christmas 2015.  It is a tall order, but I know it can happen! We started the process of bringing our daughter into our family in May of 2013, so we are already over 2 years into this journey.

I am very excited though that I will be returning to Haiti in August with a missions team from our church and will get to spend some great time with our daughter during that trip.  These trips mean the world to me and are so helpful in continuing to build that bond between us.   So I am counting down the days....21 to go!

"Mommy, Mommy"

Well we are in our way home now. The goodbye was tough, our girl at a few moments would let the sadness of our goodbye show, and then at other times the tough armor she has been forced to wear throughout her life from all her losses would go on and no emotion of the goodbye would show in her. As she pulled out of the driveway on the last day, she was wearing a smile and waving. I had my sunglasses on to try to hide the emotions inside as I know her heart and how she hurts for others more than for herself, so I didn't want her to see my sorrow so I bared a smile back and a wave goodbye.  This is that part of adoption that is hard, really hard! But I know the future blessings to come and the ones we have already experienced with our daughter will far outweigh the pain as God will make beauty from today's pain. 

So as I am flying home I am reflecting on the whole trip, and I continue to be heart broken for the deep sadness that is masked in the creche by the kids there with their playfulness with each other and the laughter you hear.   But throughout each day the moments come, you see the pain emerge in their eyes,  a trigger, each and every child at the creche you will see it. They instinctly know they need a mommy....and it so ironic that every female visitor they call mommy and at all times there will be a little one at your feet, arms up, hoping you will pick them up and give them some love, "mommy,mommy" they say.

I am self conscious about my body, lots of women are, I know this, but it's a struggle I don't let others see, but it's there. But on this trip, I found myself not only losing this part of me and not caring, but actually feeling myself happy that I am "a little squishy". You see, these little ones, no matter how small, know they need a mommy. Ed, Claire, and I were all ready and willing to hold the little ones at anytime, but we all noticed they would fight the most for me....and I kept clearly hearing that these kids need that soft, squishy, mommy type of cuddling.  They would tolerate Ed and Claire's lap, but they wanted mine. Every child there, no matter how active, once they got a spot on my lap would stay there perfectly content for as long as I let them. So many of them would drift off to sleep and I would wonder how few of times in this child's life have they actually been held as they drift off and the contradiction of how many times our children stateside have gotten this luxury, to the point that they don't know it is a gift. Part of our adoption process is this two week bonding trip and I knew the Lord had us here for this time not just for our daughter, but to be that mommy for those other kids whose mommies can't be there or who don't have one....Yet.

There was one boy in particular, for privacy I can't say his name, so I'll call him "A". "A" is the wild one, who was always climbing the thing he shouldn't climb, jumping off the highest point he could get to, always doing something he wasn't supposed to do. I've seen those kids before, and usually those types will never settle down in your lap, but I kept hearing the spirit say "A" needs to be held the most, make room on your lap for "A", and every time I did, that whirlwind kid would nestle into me so close and his hand would always grab tight to any part of me, like he had to hold tight so he wouldn't lose this "mommy moment".  Everytime it left me awe and also broken hearted that such an energetic kid would have such a huge need to be held that he could restrain all his energy to be held.  In these moments such great joy I would feel knowing the Lord let me hold one of His babies, let me be part of this, let me be that mommy for an hour to "A" and the other little ones. 

I had some great time with Kathi, the director of C4C, and was asking about their needs, and she said there greatest need is to have people come and just hold babies, love on them, interact with them, bring them a toy, as being in this environment is the toughest on the babies and toddlers. The older kids have each other and school, it's not the best situation, but they have something, the little ones need a mommy right now, even for an hour. I keep thinking of all the squishy mommies I know and how blessed each of those mommies would be to get to love on these kids.  

Deuteronomy 24:19-22

When you are harvesting in your field and you overlook a sheaf, do not go back to get it. Leave it for the alien, the fatherless and the widow, so that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands. When you beat the olives from your trees, do not go over the branches a second time. Leave what remains for the alien, the fatherless and the widow. When you harvest the grapes in your vinyard, do not go over the vines again. Leave what remains for the alien, the fatherless and the widow. Remember that you were slaves in Egypt. That is why I command you to do this.

We are all so blessed with leftover "grapes from our vinyard", we have so much extra love we can give as we have been so greatly loved ourselves. There is a need, I have seen it, I have experienced it, and for "A", I met it. Can you go and meet an orphans need? Ask me how if you're interested.